Life has been a whirlwind recently. Been ups and downs. Good news and bad news. But the last few weeks over all have been good. I feel like I am on the right path. But I have been negligent in saying one thing that has been wonderful in my life.
A friend of mine who has horses is letting me work with her horses. Giving up Dill was so hard. She and I had talked about Dill and horses before everything happened. The day after I said good bye to Dill, she asked if I would come over and spend some time with one of her horses who just needed some extra attention.
And of course I jumped at the opportunity. And for the past two weeks I have been enjoying helping out with some barn chores and just loving on her beautiful horses. The beautiful buckskin cross draft is so much fun. Typical gelding, heck typical horse, he likes to test his limits. He likes to see what he can get away with. But most horses are that way. They are a herd animal and they want to know where they stand in the herd. If they can get higher in the herd, they will.
So he likes to test the situation but I think he is figuring out where I fit. Last night I just had so much fun loving on him. I had so much fun cleaning off his well-earned mud. I had fun getting him to pick up his hooves. Last night he didn’t really test me. He just enjoyed the loving, the praise and the attention.
Horses mimic your attitude and feelings. That is why they are so great with therapy. You get back what you give. They can sense so much about you that it is like looking into a mirror. If you are nervous, the horse gets nervous. Etc. They are amazing animals.
Last night was the first night where I spent time just loving on him. I could see him loving it. I could see him appreciating it. It wasn’t an “okay I will tolerate this human” mentality that I would get occasionally from Dill. It was, “ohh this is nice!” I got lots of licks with no teeth showing. I got his head nuzzling up against me. I had his attention, even when he was eating. He was paying attention to me. He was curious about what I was up to.
Having a horse’s curiosity is like them offering up their mind. They are not watching out of fear. They are not bored with your presence. But rather they are interested in what you are doing. They are interested in what you will do next.
There really is something about the outside of a horse that is good for the inside of a man, or woman, as the saying goes. There is something about the smell of horse on your hands. I kept breathing it in all night. I didn’t want to wash my hands because I knew I would remove the smell. My heart was content for the experience. I went home with a sense of joy. Went home happy for my time with the beautiful buckskin. I felt accepted because of how he responded to me.
To this friend, and you know who you are. You have given me a gift beyond monetary value. You have given me a blessing I never thought of asking for. I know I say Thank You a lot to you. But it is because I cannot think of a better phrase for my appreciation. I love my time mucking or carrying water buckets. I love scraping mud off from a coat. I love it all. And you have given this tired heart so much joy. You have given me a purpose, a project. You have given me something to concentrate on rather than my illness. I feel whole with horses and you have given me time to feel whole. I am forever in your debt.
With much love, THANK YOU!